Family Circle
WHO GREE-GREE HELP? MAKE THAT MOVE…
By Ovundah Nyeche.
Donald went out early today, he had an appointment by 8:00 am and he did not want to arrive late. But when he got midway to his destination, he was held up in traffic, a journey of thirty minutes was now approaching one hour.
The cars in front of him were moving slower than a tired tortoise, “What was the cause of this traffic?” He asked himself. When his car finally reached the bottle neck, he discovered that there was an accident. The occupants of the car were rushed to the hospital and their lives were hanging by a thin thread.
Mr A was driving in his lane, he had the right of way, Mr B was driving in Mr A’s lane from the opposite direction, and was trying to overtake another car, he saw Mr A approaching, flashed him and assumed Mr A would slow down. Mr A wanted to teach Mr B a lesson, ” Mr B should know he was driving in a lane not his and should slow down” he said. And before we could shout #Hearword they had a head-on collision. They were really in a bad shape and their vehicles were damaged beyond repair.
As Donald passed their wrecked vehicles, he felt so much pity for the drivers. The road was freer after the impasse and then he suddenly remembered that he had an appointment to catch, looking at the clock in the car he had just twenty minutes to get to the venue.
He had to march his foot throttle so his car could move faster, he had an appointment to catch. As he got closer to the venue, he saw an incoming vehicle about fifty meters away, trying to overtake a truck. He flashed the driver, but the driver was still speeding, horned but he was still speeding. Donald simply applied his break, slowed down and cleared from the road to allow the impatient and reckless driver overtake the truck. He would not be the next one involved in a head on collision.
Even though he was right, he simply slowed down and cleared from the road. He knew “gree-gree” will land him where he never intended going. He got to the venue for the appointment on time, and the day was a great day for him.
As he approached home after the day, his smile soon turned to a frown, he was going to meet his annoying wife. They had been having several arguments and had not talked to themselves for awhile. From looking like a couple on a ship going to a destination few years ago when they married, they were looking like two people driving different cars in the opposite direction in full speed, they were in fact complete strangers now living under the same roof.
As Donald thought about his day, he realised his home was gradually going on a collision course and he realised that this “gree-gree” would help no one, he realised he slowed down for an impatient and reckless driver who was a perfect stranger so their cars and live would be spared, how much more his wife, the love of his life.
As he got to the gate of his house rather than entering inside, he reversed his car, went to a supermarket got his wife some stuff including a necklace and a perfume and when he came back knelt down to apologise to her and made a decision to listen better and told her he was willing to work on their relationship and be better for their relationship. While she was still opening her mouth, wondering what happened, he gave her the perfume and put the necklace on her neck, by this time she was now crying and asking for forgiveness too.
Who loves head on collisions? Donald did not and I am sure, you don’t too. Make that move, slow down and save your marriage; “gree-gree” will take you no where, save onlookers the anguish of looking at your badly damaged cars.
#HearWord
By Ovundah Nyeche.
When you get married, apart from your children school fees, one issue that will talk to you every year/season, if you stay in a country like Nigeria and you don’t have your property, stay in your organization’s accommodation, or have your accommodation sorted out by your organization, is the issue of house rent.
Yes, house rents speaks so loud…and house rents can cause family problems if not tackled with wisdom, reality and the truth.
As a couple, it is important you tell yourself basic truths about your finances and plan accordingly.
Yes your ‘levels’ may be saying GRA or Peter Odili road or Banana Island, but what does your pocket say? Knowing that in 12 months time, the house rent bell will ring again…and for unexplained reasons it is usually easier to pay the first rent than subsequent ones in many cases.
Like someone advised your yearly house rent should not be more than 20% of your yearly income or yearly profi and trust me ‘e no easy to bring out’ the whole rent at once, so it may be wisdom to save monthly for it. So if you can’t bring out (let’s say your house rent is #1,000,000 yearly) #100,000 monthly comfortably, it may be very difficult to pay the #1,000,000 at once and it may be a pointer, that you are living above your means.
May the Lord grant us wisdom and may you not live your life on other people’s impression about you…or plan your budget based on the circle of friends you belong to. All fingers are not equal, even if they are part of the same hand.
Telling yourselves basic truths, can save your family a whole lot of headache…yes, life is not always straight forward and hard times and emergencies can sometimes come unannounced, but to the best of your abilities, be truthful to yourselves.
Like a proverb says “No look another person pot of soup, do garri”…’e go shock you’.
May wisdom lead you.
#HearWord #ovdspeaks #HearWordseries
By Ovundah Nyeche.
One of the many questions I ask people getting married, is what their expectations about marriage is? And what exactly they expect from their spouse? And as always respect, love, protection, submission, provision, companionship, children etc. may mean different things to different couples and people.
Many times many of the disappointment about marriage is that many of these expectations, many not voiced, written or expressly communicated are not met… And many times many of these expectations are formed from social media, music lyrics, films and many are without a tinge of reality.
Wisdom is really knowing and agreeing on these expectations and also knowing that things may not exactly go according to plan and when they don’t, both couple should be willing to negotiate unexpected bends and do all within their ability to make their home work.
A good home is not wished for, it is not just prayed for, it is worked for by both parties and it is a full time job.
I don’t know who is going through difficult times at home, or navigating bends you never envisioned, or disillusioned with what you are currently seeing… getting scored early goals, by the team called ‘challenges’, does not necessarily mean you will lose the match or your home; getting knocked down in the first round by challenges, does not necessarily mean you have lost out completely.
It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation; It takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies. It’s better to be wise than strong; intelligence outranks muscle any day. Strategic planning is the key to warfare; to win, you need a lot of good counsel. Proverbs 24:3-6 MSG
Wisdom oh Lord we pray, wisdom oh Lord we apply. @ovdiasis
By Ovundah Nyeche.
Months ago, I was privileged to be a guest, in an all women therapy session…
And the moderator, wanted the participants to open up and talk…
And gave a caveat, when it was time for the feedback…
“No men bashing, will be allowed here”, she said, I loved this,as the session focused on issues and not gender or sex chromosomes.
In my observation, and my journey hearing stories and helping people, I know there are 3 sides to every story.
His side, her side and the TRUTH, which may be her side of the story, his side of the story, their stories or none of their story…
Are you are man, having turmoil in your marriage;be careful of those who tell you, all women are evil, beat am, cheat more, knack am something, fear women etc… Be careful of closed groups that paint women as evil and fan your indiscretions, idiosyncrasies and stupidity…be careful about any group that makes you more toxic.
Are you a woman, having turmoil in your marriage;be careful of those that tell you, to get rid of the man and make him disappear, they won’t serve your jail term/death sentence with you… Be wary of people that tell you to spill the sweet blood, that has turned sour… Be wary of people especially that have intact marriages, but shout at the top of their voice ‘Menascum’, be careful about those who ended their marriages and encourage you to do so, at the slightest sneeze…
Be careful about groups, that encourage you to pour bile orally, visually or via text…
Are you a Christian, be careful about taking decisions, that though are popular and would give you likes and shares, and hail you as brave… But are contrary to the Word of God…
Be careful about making life changing decisions, when you are very enraged and clouded by emotions…
I said I should let you know…
Many times what you need is wisdom… You cannot use a razor blade to cut an iroko tree, because it can cut your toenail…
hearword #OvdSpeaks #hearwordseries
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Ofor Ifeanyichukwu
August 22, 2017 at 5:37 am
When we all decide that we are not always right, when we all decide that we need each other to coexist peacefully, the world will be a much better place.
Ovundah
August 22, 2017 at 5:50 pm
Very true.
OBINNA Eze
August 22, 2017 at 7:51 am
Good one am bless by this article, things I thought I knew is like a new thing to me now Thank you doctor for this.
Ovundah
August 22, 2017 at 5:49 pm
Thank you for your feedback
Rare Diamondz
August 22, 2017 at 3:43 pm
Just bumped into this blog via a link. Good job Dr.Ovunda. u are really imparting lives,I’m inspired.
Ovundah
August 22, 2017 at 5:45 pm
Thank you so much and God bless you.
Ovundah
August 25, 2017 at 5:51 pm
Thank you for your kind words…Let others know about the blog too.
Ojimba Nengi
August 23, 2017 at 9:32 am
Thank you for this. True true, gree gree no help anybody…
Ovundah
August 27, 2017 at 5:59 am
Thanks for your comment Nengi.
Iyke Abolle
August 23, 2017 at 10:23 pm
OVD,
This write-up is on point!
Ovundah
August 24, 2017 at 6:11 am
Thank you for reading this post and commenting, let others know about “Who gree-gree help? Make that move”. Great hearing from you Iyke Abolle.
Gladys Shawana
August 26, 2017 at 8:44 am
Well done Sir…God bless you
Ovundah
August 27, 2017 at 5:59 am
Thanks and amen, Ma.
tamunobelema alamina
August 27, 2017 at 7:02 am
True, even if your right, it’s interesting to see the other persons reaction some times. Have the bigger picture in view
Ovundah
September 5, 2017 at 10:25 pm
Thanks for your comment Belz
IfyGod
December 13, 2017 at 4:24 am
Another wonderful piece OVD. God bless you bro. We all sure need to slow down at some points in life to avoid collisions.
Ovundah
December 13, 2017 at 2:37 pm
Thank you so much Sir for your feedback.