By Ovundah Nyeche.
Donald went out early today, he had an appointment by 8:00 am and he did not want to arrive late. But when he got midway to his destination, he was held up in traffic, a journey of thirty minutes was now approaching one hour.
The cars in front of him were moving slower than a tired tortoise, “What was the cause of this traffic?” He asked himself. When his car finally reached the bottle neck, he discovered that there was an accident. The occupants of the car were rushed to the hospital and their lives were hanging by a thin thread.
Mr A was driving in his lane, he had the right of way, Mr B was driving in Mr A’s lane from the opposite direction, and was trying to overtake another car, he saw Mr A approaching, flashed him and assumed Mr A would slow down. Mr A wanted to teach Mr B a lesson, ” Mr B should know he was driving in a lane not his and should slow down” he said. And before we could shout #Hearword they had a head-on collision. They were really in a bad shape and their vehicles were damaged beyond repair.
As Donald passed their wrecked vehicles, he felt so much pity for the drivers. The road was freer after the impasse and then he suddenly remembered that he had an appointment to catch, looking at the clock in the car he had just twenty minutes to get to the venue.
He had to march his foot throttle so his car could move faster, he had an appointment to catch. As he got closer to the venue, he saw an incoming vehicle about fifty meters away, trying to overtake a truck. He flashed the driver, but the driver was still speeding, horned but he was still speeding. Donald simply applied his break, slowed down and cleared from the road to allow the impatient and reckless driver overtake the truck. He would not be the next one involved in a head on collision.
Even though he was right, he simply slowed down and cleared from the road. He knew “gree-gree” will land him where he never intended going. He got to the venue for the appointment on time, and the day was a great day for him.
As he approached home after the day, his smile soon turned to a frown, he was going to meet his annoying wife. They had been having several arguments and had not talked to themselves for awhile. From looking like a couple on a ship going to a destination few years ago when they married, they were looking like two people driving different cars in the opposite direction in full speed, they were in fact complete strangers now living under the same roof.
As Donald thought about his day, he realised his home was gradually going on a collision course and he realised that this “gree-gree” would help no one, he realised he slowed down for an impatient and reckless driver who was a perfect stranger so their cars and live would be spared, how much more his wife, the love of his life.
As he got to the gate of his house rather than entering inside, he reversed his car, went to a supermarket got his wife some stuff including a necklace and a perfume and when he came back knelt down to apologise to her and made a decision to listen better and told her he was willing to work on their relationship and be better for their relationship. While she was still opening her mouth, wondering what happened, he gave her the perfume and put the necklace on her neck, by this time she was now crying and asking for forgiveness too.
Who loves head on collisions? Donald did not and I am sure, you don’t too. Make that move, slow down and save your marriage; “gree-gree” will take you no where, save onlookers the anguish of looking at your badly damaged cars.
Wisdom for two
By Ovundah Nyeche.
One of the many questions I ask people getting married, is what their expectations about marriage is? And what exactly they expect from their spouse? And as always respect, love, protection, submission, provision, companionship, children etc. may mean different things to different couples and people.
Many times many of the disappointment about marriage is that many of these expectations, many not voiced, written or expressly communicated are not met… And many times many of these expectations are formed from social media, music lyrics, films and many are without a tinge of reality.
Wisdom is really knowing and agreeing on these expectations and also knowing that things may not exactly go according to plan and when they don’t, both couple should be willing to negotiate unexpected bends and do all within their ability to make their home work.
A good home is not wished for, it is not just prayed for, it is worked for by both parties and it is a full time job.
I don’t know who is going through difficult times at home, or navigating bends you never envisioned, or disillusioned with what you are currently seeing… getting scored early goals, by the team called ‘challenges’, does not necessarily mean you will lose the match or your home; getting knocked down in the first round by challenges, does not necessarily mean you have lost out completely.
It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation; It takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies. It’s better to be wise than strong; intelligence outranks muscle any day. Strategic planning is the key to warfare; to win, you need a lot of good counsel. Proverbs 24:3-6 MSG
Wisdom oh Lord we pray, wisdom oh Lord we apply. @ovdiasis
Wisdom for two…
By Ovundah Nyeche.
Months ago, I was privileged to be a guest, in an all women therapy session…
And the moderator, wanted the participants to open up and talk…
And gave a caveat, when it was time for the feedback…
“No men bashing, will be allowed here”, she said, I loved this,as the session focused on issues and not gender or sex chromosomes.
In my observation, and my journey hearing stories and helping people, I know there are 3 sides to every story.
His side, her side and the TRUTH, which may be her side of the story, his side of the story, their stories or none of their story…
Are you are man, having turmoil in your marriage;be careful of those who tell you, all women are evil, beat am, cheat more, knack am something, fear women etc… Be careful of closed groups that paint women as evil and fan your indiscretions, idiosyncrasies and stupidity…be careful about any group that makes you more toxic.
Are you a woman, having turmoil in your marriage;be careful of those that tell you, to get rid of the man and make him disappear, they won’t serve your jail term/death sentence with you… Be wary of people that tell you to spill the sweet blood, that has turned sour… Be wary of people especially that have intact marriages, but shout at the top of their voice ‘Menascum’, be careful about those who ended their marriages and encourage you to do so, at the slightest sneeze…
Be careful about groups, that encourage you to pour bile orally, visually or via text…
Are you a Christian, be careful about taking decisions, that though are popular and would give you likes and shares, and hail you as brave… But are contrary to the Word of God…
Be careful about making life changing decisions, when you are very enraged and clouded by emotions…
I said I should let you know…
Many times what you need is wisdom… You cannot use a razor blade to cut an iroko tree, because it can cut your toenail…
hearword #OvdSpeaks #hearwordseries
Two can walk together forever…
By Ovundah Nyeche.
In all thy getting, don’t break your marriage or enter marital problems because of things you read on social media.
All these you are so brave, na so, if it is me… I will not take it… Nonsense man or woman… If he does it, I will do him/her back… Men and women must be put in their place, meniscus, womeniscus, et al… May not be the best for you.
It is also important to note that, people who pour and fire, fire on social media, may not be what they fire in real life…also it is important not to build your marriage on templates that may be faulty.
Like football, great coaches, have a plan or tactics to use, but adapt with the game at hand… Great coaches know when to go for possession and when to concede possession…they know goals and not stats win matches.
As a Christian, my allegiance is to the Word of God, and it guides my relationship with my spouse.
You ginger all the ginger and the word of God, reminds you, O boy, you no try, O boy just look your face for mirror, see that plank wey dey your eyes… 😂 😂 😂 And boom you want to drag leg… But the word of God is not your mate… And you obey and get back your peace…
Like I tell those I tell… Marriage is not war, it is not male vs female… It is not pishim pishim … But a deliberate union, where a man and his wife makes a decision together surmount any challenge and be all what God has destined for them …
If both of you agree to #hearword and both bring 💯 into the union, not 50-50, both of you are vulnerable and open to yourself in your union and ditch the “do you know who I am” or “I did you a favour by marrying you” 😂 😂 😂 and are willing to make your marriage work irrespective of the normal stresses of the relationship… Where both of you look out for the good of your spouse and are willing to walk and work it out to success…
Marriage is a full time job… Don’t allow social media deceive you, it requires investment and thought in the direction you wish it to take… marriage is a wonderful thing…
Everyday airplanes take off and land… Ironically it is the planes that crash or have turbulence that make news… Everyday cars go on long distance journeys and arrive, but it is those that crash or have a mishap that make news…Ships also leave ports and arrive at their destinations, but again, disaster makes more news.
Don’t allow crashes define or determine the mood of your journey…who goes for a journey and is preoccupied about a crash.
It will work out, it is working out… If you are not hearing word in any area of your life be it anger, infidelity, violence, et al … Go and seek for help and don’t commonize it… Get accountable… Invest in knowledge…fix self… Do all you can to make your marriage work.
#selah #hearword #OvdSpeaks #hearwordseries
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