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By Uchenna Ezenwa Akujobi

Some dude came requesting for me, said he heard I was the “HIV doctor”. Nna mehn…when I heard this, I almost fainted. What does he even mean? Well, he said someone sent him to see me. Now, he’s been dating this girl for more than two years and he says he really loves her. He is also a born again child of God and he is filled with the Holy Spirit. He asked me “Doc are you born again?”
I looked at him like “Guy, is that why you are here?”

I was having a terrible day; I had lost a patient earlier and it wasn’t funny. Plus I was still confused and pondering over the “HIV doctor” thing.

Me: “Bros how can I really help you… and I’m Dr. Uche, by the way, not HIV doctor”.
Him: “My brother, this my fiancee and I…”

He went on to give me gist many of which I didn’t ask for. He talked about how they met and their journey thus far. How he hadn’t touched her until 48 hrs ago. He is born again and filled with the Spirit of God but then he let his guard loose and the devil led him to fornicate. They had sex about thrice on Saturday night and they went to church together on Sunday morning.#Clearsthroat.

While in church he felt so much guilt and his spirit led him to do a HIV test. He wanted to marry her so what the heck, he considered it the pre-premarital screening. They went to a “chemist” owned by a friend. By the time they were done, his friend said the result was inconclusive. Mr. Friend eventually called him aside and directed him here to see the “HIV doctor”; and here was he seeing me on a Monday morning.

For my mind I was like “Oh, so that’s the person that called me ‘HIV doctor’… people don’t have sense ooo. When you call someone the ‘HIV doctor’, doesn’t it sound somehow in your head? Like you just referred to him as the doctor who’s HIV positive? It’s like when you deliver a baby and they start calling you the “Woman doctor”.

Well … so we repeated the HIV tests and guess what? I had a discordant couple in my hands. It’s a very delicate thing trying to convince someone it’s going to be OK when their spouse is positive and they aren’t…Well, his fiancee was positive. He was negative. The post-test counselling was just another kettle of fish. I spoke to the lady first.

Me: “So my dear how’re you? …your Oga say mak una do HIV test”.
She: “Na so I see am … She was smiling”.
Me: “So what do you know about HIV / AIDS?”
She: “I know say once person get am, e better make him just die first than for people to hear”

She went on and on to confirm all the balderdash information about HIV in circulation today. It is so glaring that many people are so misinformed

Just to put it out there
1- HIV is not an attack from your village people. 
2- There are a thousand and one medical conditions that can kill you faster.
3- It’s contracted from exposure to body fluids containing the virus… mostly from unprotected sexual intercourse. .
4- It has no cure at the moment.
5- Adherence to anti HIV drugs can help you live a normal life for a very long time even if you’re infected.

I can go on and on but no one listens to a doctor these days especially on health issues…

She went on to tell me she didn’t even love this guy. He was just the one amongst the many who had stepped up to ask her to marry him. She was seeing three guys. The one she really loved was a bastard. She spent Friday night with him. They had sex…it was probably so good she was knocked unconscious ‘cos in her sleep, he left. She woke up and he was nowhere in sight. He returned hours later and she wondered where he went. She went through his phone and saw things. Apparently he left her on his bed and went to visit some other babe who was thanking him via text for the love-making that hot Saturday afternoon. They had a fight and he sent her away.

Stranded, she decided to visit this bro that loves her so much. One thing led to another & they were having marathon sex on Saturday night. Nna Mehn, my mouth open, I was looking at her in total bewilderment… I was just wondering how someone intended to marry someone she does not love and how her partner thought she did; I was wondering how a rela. I asked her what she’d do if she was positive… She said she’d retire to somewhere and kill herself.
Me: “Well my sister… I’m sorry but you’re HIV positive…We’d run some confirmatory tests and…”
She: “Doctor wait…Stop talking (she was looking me dead in the eyes, she had the look of someone who’d kill herself, and she was no longer smiling). You wouldn’t tell my Oga about this right…”
Me: “Of course I wouldn’t but….”
She: “Shhhhhhh!!! Just be quiet Doc…”

My brother fear begin catch me ooo.

Will complete this later, let me answer an urgent call.


Any similarity with persons in the above story and any other person living, dead or in between is surely a coincidence.

#HearWord #HearWordSeries

Uchenna Ezenwa Akujobi studied Medicine and Surgery in the University of Port Harcourt. He is a stock trader, a practicing doctor; and writing happens to be one of many things he is very fond of. He is passionate about sharing authentic and useful health information with the public in forms that are very interesting, easy to read and relate to. When not relating with humans he spends time grooming and raising his dogs.

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    August 18, 2017 at 9:19 pm

    Waiting to see the end

  2. Avatar


    August 22, 2017 at 5:51 pm

    Thank you Sir, it will be released soon.

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Family Circle

How Expensive are Expensive Weddings?





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By Edisemi Okpokiti

The cost for marriages is another reason for low marriages and also early broken marriages…it brings too much pressure to the equation.
Too much expectations, too much injuries in the process to accomplish, too much division already between new families who ought to be uniting, too much attention of the supposed spouse on an event than on the marriage.

Too much false hood expressed that has to be sustained, but with no basis for maintenance. Too much bad blood between supposed couples before they even start their home.

Many marriages ended on the night or morning after the wedding ceremony.

People regret night after their traditional wedding, and ask if it was worth all the tension, pressure and troubles or are visibly sad all through the wedding realising they have short changed themselves.

Love is stifled by fleshy lust of men and women for rights,privileges and inordinate desires to feel among. Many work for years to blow it one week 😭😭

Once the cost of the price to marry is reduced, the attention will be shifted to what my choice person thinks or feels and not what people think or feel; and that’s how relationships are built.

Preparation for marriage ought to be a good opportunity for people to know and get more acquainted with themselves but the pressure makes them distant from themselves, cursing, fighting and bitter at each other for their difference in priority and the family effect on them.

Father in-laws, mother in-laws , Siblings already become vouched enemies even before they know themselves.

It’s pathetic that poor families are the most expensive ones to marry from, it’s like these marriages is their visa out of poverty.

Elders have become children in their conduct and character just because of a young child’s money collected with the deceit of a priceless adventure.

Churches should adopt like the Orthodox churches now do for burials, giving specific date you must bury after death, thereby forcing hands to bury with what they have and not what they think they want.

Weddings in churches should be encouraged to be done even in midweeks and without receptions.

Young people also should stop talking of dream marriages. The women especially would shout “It is not in my turn, I’ll fall my hands”, but can’t you all see ,the men are not proposing because they are afraid and do not have what your entire village will demand? Ladies have to start discussing with their fathers and uncles and defend their husband to be.

Money spent on Marriages in this country, especially by the middle class and poor if invested could make those couples financially stable.

The steam most times is off before the team comes to field.

Many have lost even before the game starts.

Well for those who are really really well to do and I mean both not that the man is. Those whose families have more than enough to spare, then you are not stopped from your ecstasy.

If you are in relationship, and it’s not taking the next step this is a major cause. Seat with yourselves, seat with your parents and pastors and achieve your desire without destroying your desire. SELAH!

If you are a sibling or parent , please assist and clear all barriers and ensure your children and siblings don’t have this as a barrier preventing their marriage.

The age of unmarried is increasing daily to an average of 30…if this menace is not addressed …we will soon hit 35 yrs as average age of unmarried girls.

Let the wise hear, but the foolish rant…Life is a choice.

A counsel is not forced on anyone.

Edisemi Okpokiti is the Lead Faculty, The Pulpit and Lead Consultant of Rhabonni Consult Limited (A Human Capital Development Consultancy Firm). He is a trained Information Management Consultant and passionate preacher of the gospel.

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Opinions Today, Pinions Tomorrow





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By Perez Tigidam

Nigeria is full of drama and the growing internet penetration and social media usage amplifies this daily. Individuals and even corporations are constantly being sucked into this pool of daily drama.

My thought is simple, if you must be an active and opinionated participant in every raging conversation on the internet, ensure you do so from the place of thought and principles and not an emotional rush, no matter how logical it might sound at the moment.

The internet archives, it never forgets.

Perez Tigidam

If you stand for a wrong today and months after try to go against that wrong because this time, you’re emotional towards one party involved, it means that you lack principle in the first place. Because the internet never forgets, people will call your bluff while referring to precedence.

It is very easy to glide into contradiction and inconsistency when you always have to offer opinion or hard stance not backed by principles.

Before you tweet, think. Before you post, pause to ponder.

perez tigidam

I have a particular friend who knows me so well that, in my absence, he can literally tell you what my position will be on any given issue even without hearing from me. Same for him. This is because -not to sound saintly- we’ve been consistent in our thought pattern over a long period of time. Our positions on things are always not popular but there’s been a pattern and we’ve been consistent.

One last thing,

In a low trust society like Nigeria, it’s important that you’re consistent in character and in principles. It helps when those with less knowledge of you bring up disparaging commentary of your person.

Last year, I had a fall out with a client and someone asked me, “What if this client decides to give a negative feedback on referrals?” My response was simple, my disagreement is not out of bad character but out of principle that binds a contractual relationship. Of every one client relationship that goes wrong, there are 9 others that will stand vehemently for me, because of character and precedence.

You can say I am not cheap when it comes to billing for my services and I’d agree, but I do not know that I am a cheat or dubious in character, for this I am grateful for my upbringing and can raise my shoulder anywhere to this.

If I disagree vehemently with a friend or a client, it’s mostly not out of bad character but out of principle. I rarely do shift from my position, either I just want to let you have your way and move on or I’m deeply convinced that my position is wrong, which doesn’t happen instantaneously either. I have to slowly be convinced on facts and principles that support that position, it’s the reason people say I’m stubborn.

But I am not.

Perez Tigidam is a brand management consultant and media entrepreneur based in Nigeria. He runs one of Nigeria’s foremost brand consultancy and design firms Arden & Newton Ltd and doubles up as the user experience and content strategy team lead at TheNerve Africa.

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Going back to the basics.





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By Nimi Stephanie Ekere.

Last year, we were woken up to the news of a student who tried to poison his colleague because she was doing better than him, academically. This was to say the

least, frightening. That for me, set my mind wondering what the home environment of the said student was. If a child in Secondary school could think of something so terrible, it clearly showed that his family, which is the smallest unit of the society was in a wrong state. The reason is that the family forms most of a person’s values, at least at that tender age.


Recently, the suicide rate in the country has become so alarmingly high and particularly scary amongst young people. Young people take their lives for the flimsiest reasons. It’s either you hear that they took their lives because they were heartbroken in their relationship, they failed an exam or someone spoke to them badly.


In the past, we were known for our resilience and ability to adapt to even the most unfriendly situations, so what suddenly changed?


I would like us to look into the family setting and review our parenting styles and strategies. A lot has changed. Yes, I think a lot has changed so much; and this does not mean that our parents were perfect in the past. They made their mistakes but to a very large extent, they did a lot of things right.


Many modern day parents are so concerned about pleasing their children that a lot of areas are left unattended to. There seems to be no standards and values which are the bedrock of effective parenting.


The twenty first century parent is caught up in the web of an extremely busy schedule in the pursuit of money and when they make it, throw it at the child and fail to invest quality time with their children and lose the opportunity to discover their children and what they are growing up to become.


For many of these children, integrity means little or nothing, and the child having nothing to emulate, seeks help from his peers and the television.


Nannies have taken over the place of mothers in the lives of these children. And because parents are not always visible, and even if they are visible, they are unavailable, there lies a wide communication breakdown. And if a child cannot talk

or discuss everything with his parents, there usually are deadly alternatives for them.


Parents try to compensate for these deficiencies with wonderful vacations, gifts, expensive clothes and shoes and other luxuries. While these are wonderful, they do not take the place of deliberate, intentional and effective parenting.


Also, a lot of children are suffering from low self-esteem because of the unrealistic expectations and pressures from their parents. ‘Have you seen Linda’s results?’

Why can’t you come first place like Jonathan?’ This is all the child hears and gradually, his self-esteem completely gets eroded and he starts seeking for validation from external sources. He begins to have envy, hatred and unhealthy competitions as part of his everyday life.


This begins to manifest in his behaviour towards others. An example is the case of the seventeen year old boy that was left to drown by his friends because they were jealous of him. There are multiples of examples to buttress the fact that we must go back to the basics.

Parenting must be done right if we want to see this generation of children do better than us. There is a vacuum that must be filled. We must listen to these young ones. We must try to create time for them. Our values must not be thrown out, they must be instilled in our children. We can love our children without necessarily giving them everything they want. There should be discipline

in parenting. Sometimes, giving them all they want is not to their advantage. We must learn to know when to draw the line.


Their strengths should be celebrated while their weaknesses worked on. Unhealthy competitions are really unhealthy for them. We must know that every child is unique and is created differently with a special gift to change her world.


Prayer is an inevitable tool in effective parenting. Every word of prayer said on our children’s behalf is a seed that will germinate and yield fruits, good fruits. This said, prayers must go hand in hand with hard work as even the Bible admonishes us to intentionally, train up our children in a way that they should go and when they are old, they would not depart from it.


Thank you for reading this, I hope to get your feedback.







Dr Nimi Stephanie Ekere is a wife, mother and Family Physician. She enjoys writing, reading and attending to her patients.  She is a life coach and teacher, who is passionate about children and young people walking in the right course and path to achieve their full potential.

Her Foundation, Ekom Charity Foundation mentors young people and also cares for the less privileged.

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Copyright © 2019 Dr. Ovundah Nyeche, All Rights Reserved.

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