By Oluchi Okafor Ugwunne.

Hi friends. Just to share something with you.

Ladies, we’ve all been there. You see a lovely hair style on a friend, and immediately love it. But as you make the same style at the salon, you realise it’s super painful, it takes lots of hours to get done, your hairdresser didn’t get the style well, and it doesn’t look half as good as it looked on your friend. *Sigh*

Or, you see an outfit on the internet that looks so good, and decide to get your tailor to sew it. S/he sews it alright, but when you wear it, you start to have second thoughts. Maybe this style just doesn’t suit my body structure, you sigh.

Or, you get caught in a holdup, and have to decide if to take the next detour or not. It looked like the wisest thing to do- so you turn off at the next street. But a few metres down the road, you meet traffic that’s even worse than the one you were trying to avoid.

If you hadn’t done that hairdo…or sewn the outfit…or taken the detour… You’d have felt like you were missing something. But alas, it didn’t turn out quite like you expected. Were you actually missing anything, then?

I don’t know why…maybe it’s the reflection of the sunlight. Or the distance from our eyes. But why does the grass always seem greener on our neighbour’s yard?





You keep beating yourself up about how if you had studied that course, you’d have earned a better grade and found a better job. But truth be told, you don’t know that for sure. You could have ended up getting victimized by lecturers in the department and earning a lower score. You could have met the wrong people and been led astray from your faith. You don’t know.

You’re saying, ‘If only I had married so and so. I would have been much happier, had a blissful marriage.’ But ah, my sister, you don’t know for sure. You may have married a wife-beater…or one that would not have encouraged your dreams. His parents may not have liked you. The truth is that you can never really know someone…until you get married and start living with the person in the house.

Life will always throw us different choices. Many times we must choose one path of the other. Let’s not live life perpetually in regret, wondering how our other choices would have gone, because the truth is that, though it could have gone better, there’s also the possibility that it could have gone worse.

Don’t beat yourself up about what might have been. Believe God that He is ordering your steps in the right way, and you will be at the right place, at the right time, with the right people, all the time. Trust Him to take good care of you.

Trust God to lead you in every decision you make, commit your ways to God… And leave it there. He’s faithful…and He’s ordering your steps. Just believe Him.

‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.’ Proverbs 3:6.

Much love.




Oluchi Okafor Ugwunne studied Medicine in the University of Port Harcourt, Nigeria. She is the author of Practical Advice for Girls and A Reason to Hope. Her life’s passion is helping young people discover and fulfill their God given destiny. She is married to her lovely friend and they are blessed with children.

1 comment

Very timely piece of advice. Thanks Oluchi.

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